Carrie Brownstein: Funny

Inspired by the news that The Beegees'"Staying Alive" has the perfect beat for CPR, the multi-talented Ms. Brownstein offers some other songs that can save your life in certain situations:

2. Cougar or Bear Attack

When confronted by a bear or cougar while hiking, camping or mountain-biking, don't leave your survival up to chance. We all know that freezing, making yourself look bigger, maintaining eye contact and backing away slowly are the correct survival methods in this situation. But most people decide, wrongly, to run. However, many survivors of bear and cougar attacks have one thing in common: They all reported humming the tune "Suite: Judy Blues Eyes" by Crosby, Stills & Nash. It helps to hum the tune out loud, but only the end. (Yes, the "do do do do do DO DO do do do do" part.) When the bear or cougar retreats in response to this life-affirming melody, Crosby, Stills, Nash & You have won.

She also explains what songs to sing/hum/listen to in the event of choking ("War"), fire ("A Horse with No Name"), shuttlecock-retrieval-related falling ("Baby Got Back"), and joke-performance asphyxiation in a dry-cleaning bag ("A Case of You").